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Let’s admit it: you stayed in that relationship for years and even after seeing 532 red flags because of both the good parts AND the bad parts.
Let me say that again. The BAD aspects were also part of why you stayed, perhaps because they gave you permission to play a certain role, perhaps the saviour or the struggling tragic martyr, that you are clearly a good person because THEY are the bad person, or whatever it is that the story may be.
What is psychotherapy REALLY about?
The drug abuse, the constant anger, the depression, and panic attacks… all that is the surface. It’s not even the Problem (yes, with a capital P!). These admittedly troubling patterns are the result of months, years, perhaps even decades of trying to come to terms with the Truth.
Life is, very simply, hard.
The frailty of our existence, its lack of inherent meaning, our own mortality and loneliness, the irreversible passage of time, and the heavy burden of responsibility for how things play out are the fundamental parameters of human existence which we cannot escape, no matter who we are and no matter how we choose to live.
If anything, behind all our worries and concerns and all of the so-called symptoms that we may manifest, lies, I suspect, our fear of knowing the real truth of how temporary we all are.