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Let’s admit it: you stayed in that relationship for years and even after seeing 532 red flags because of both the good parts AND the bad parts.
Let me say that again. The BAD aspects were also part of why you stayed, perhaps because they gave you permission to play a certain role, perhaps the saviour or the struggling tragic martyr, that you are clearly a good person because THEY are the bad person, or whatever it is that the story may be.
What’s the best way to help the people we care about?
In order for psychotherapy to be in any way productive and beneficial, it must be built on a framework where freedom of choice is elevated as the highest ideal. If we do not nurture this thought properly, then the whole effort will fall flat on its face, because the only person who can bring about real, deep, and meaningful change in your life, is YOU.
What is psychotherapy REALLY about?
The drug abuse, the constant anger, the depression, and panic attacks… all that is the surface. It’s not even the Problem (yes, with a capital P!). These admittedly troubling patterns are the result of months, years, perhaps even decades of trying to come to terms with the Truth.
“You need therapy if:”
In psychotherapy there are no gurus, there is no special secret knowledge, and there are no experts in the old sense of the word. It simply offers the time and the place for all those conversations with ourselves that, to our detriment, are easy to postpone. It offers a way to express what was until now unsaid and to explore what is all feels like and what it means.